I have a complete lack of anything to post about so I have decided to post about what is going on with ME!
I am on a diet for about the millionth time in my life. I have a constant struggle with my weight. It's a life long issue for me. I understand that, I accept that, but I am also going to continue to battle it. The last time I wrote on here about dieting was in preparation for my brother's wedding. Which I did good, I got halfway to my goal and then it was time for the wedding so I gave up. So here we go...diet number 1 million...I have now lost 10lbs and I am SOOO happy because I have hit a milestone. I am now the same weight I was before I got pregnant. Even better than that my pre-pregnancy size 8 jeans FIT!!!! This is huge for me because while I was pregnant not only did I gain tons of weight but the way my body holds on to weight changed. I had NEVER carried fat in my tummy. I was a big thigh, hippy girl but never really in my tummy. Now I have to battle that tummy fat which is upsetting.
Ok now for most people this would probably be the end of the road...yay back to where I started, all done right??? Nope not for me. Because before I got pregnant I had put on roughly 15-20 lbs right after ben and I got married. I don't really know the exact number cause I was avoiding scales like the plague. So now I would like to shoot for my pre-marriage weight! That is not by any means the smallest weight I have ever been in my adult life...no no before that I gained probably 10 or so pounds when I lived overseas in italy and tried my hardest to eat everything in sight for those months. I don't regret that at all. If you are going to live in italy for a short time eating pasta, cannoli's, breads, and cheeses is just a MUST! I look back on it with fondness. So that is the reason when people ask me "what is your goal weight?" I have to put it in terms of which goal??? I have levels to get to.
Now here's the question, why am I putting this on my blog....this is not a public issue and not exactly one I am proud of BUT sometimes I need motivation. It is all too easy to look around church or a mall or my favorite TARGET and see much fatter mothers than me toting their little ones around and I can somewhat convince myself that hey I'm ok. I rationalize way too much so this is why I am putting it on my blog for all the world to read about. If you are one of my family members or friends who actually sees me in real life and you see me and I'm all fat you can say "hey tubby magoo I thought you were supposed to be dieting? You look kinda roly-poly to me! Maybe you should put down the french fries and eat a salad" and then my motivation will snap back into place!
In all honesty I really don't care what the scale says...I use it more as a benchmark. I care about fitting in to all these clothes that I have now moved from 3 locations with me hoping that one day I would fit into them again. I love my clothes! So I will keep you updated on my progress and hopefully in the future you will be seeing less of me!!!
Thursday, March 26, 2009
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3 comments:
you are and always have been beautiful to me!!! you are a woman now and as sad as it is as we grow older we do change. having a goal size and not a goal weight is great. not an excuse;but a stay at home mom is in for a lot of temptations--you are doing great--a loving mom and wife-- thats what really counts. Aiden is happy, Ben is happy, all are healthy. dont be so hard on yourself.
wait till you get to be my age and then you can just say " to heck with it, I'm old!!!"
You definitely got the tummy fat from your mothers side of the family.
Being able to fit into a certain pair of jeans is better than any # on the scales.
Congratulations!
I love your attitude. And it's great that you are all up front with it. The first step toward defeating a problem is being all comfortable with the problem you have and tackling it head on. NO denial here.
The second step is not being one of these that continue to be satisfied with loosing the same 10 pounds over and over. Every time you talk to them, they have lost 5 pounds. But, they fail to mention that it is the same 5 pounds that they lost last month, but now they have gained it back.
So, they didn't really loose 5 NEW pounds, just the same 5 that they lost earlier, but have since gained back.
Keep up the good work. We are all your cheerleaders.
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